And how was your day….?

helplessI had a different blog in mind. Really. But something happened tonight that reinforces what my life as a writer is like. I thought it might resonate with some of you.

I was at the annual RMFW and board meeting this last Saturday (I don’t think I saw you there?). The 250 mile trip home was near blizzard, and my car ended up covered with road salts. I decided to stop at the carwash on my way home from work tonight. You know the kind— you pay, drive inside, and let it do its thing for five minutes.

Only today, the carwash had something else in mind. I ended up locked inside the car wash. Yes, that was me, sitting there with my bumper six inches from the rollup door, the dryer shaking my car like a tornado, but only drying the front three feet. Thinking it's just a matter of time before the door opens. Then sitting and waiting after the blower stopped. And waiting some more.

The whole fifteen minutes reminds me of my writing life. Where I write a great (hopefully) manuscript, clean and polish it, and when it’s nice and shiny, submit it to an agent or editor. And wait. And wait some more. Worry and second guess myself. And worry some more. Acting like it’s the only thing I can do.

But all I had to do was get out of my car, open the side door, find someone who knew what to do, and let them help me. Just as I am not some helpless old lady, I am not a helpless writer. All I need to do is gather my fellow writers around me for advice and comfort. And start writing something new while I wait. Have my critique crew give me input. Anything but just sitting and waiting for the agent to love me. For someone to rescue me.

I don’t need rescued. I can write my characters out of any situation, and I can handle these painful “wait” periods with a little help from my friends. The moral of this (long) story is…you don’t have to do this alone. You’re part of a tribe, or a seahorse herd (Susan Spann, you will forever be quoted after that epic Gold speech!). We’re all in this together. We understand each other. We’ve been there, done that, and survived. So don’t hibernate, fretting over ”will they like it or will it be a rejection”? No matter which way it goes, you’ll learn from it, and all your RMFW writer friends (even the ones you don't yet know) will cheer your successes or commiserate with your “Thanks But…” letters. Because we’ll be the ones who need it next time.

Don’t wait to be rescued. Open the door and ask for help from your fellow authors. And Write On.

Terri Benson
As a life-long writer, Terri Benson has one published novel, award winning short stories, and over a hundred articles – many award winning - in local and regional magazines and on-line e-zines. She is a multi-year member of RMFW (Western Slope Liaison & Board Education Chair, and W/S events are hosted at her employer); she is also a long-time member of RWA. Benson is a regular blogger for RMFW, and frequently pelts them with articles for the newsletter.
Her historical romance, An Unsinkable Love, a truly Titanic love story with plenty of suspense, is available from Amazon in both e-book and paperback. More about Terri on her website.

4 thoughts on “And how was your day….?

  1. Terri! You rock! Great analogy, and glad you’re free! I was once in an automated car wash when the big brushes grabbed my antenna, ripped it off, and proceeded to start flogging my car with it! Scrape, scrape, scratch scratch all over my car–what a nightmare. By the time the cycle completed, my poor canary yellow Capri was in shreds.
    I like your story better. 🙂 You’re so right about attitude. Keep on rockin’ and reaching out!

  2. I’ve never been trapped in a car wash disaster, thank goodness, but have been stuck waiting forever for responses to submissions. And for agents, sometimes forever really is forever because they don’t respond unless they’re interested.

  3. I really did have a different blog all outlined, but by the time I got home, it just seemed to be the thing I had to compare to. I’ve had pages to an agent since mid-January, and all I’ve gotten so far is an “out of office”, so at least I know it went into the black hole – whether or not it comes out is anyone’s guess. My plan is to go out the door and ask for help/reassurance from my friends – and write on!

  4. Beautifully said, Terri! Thanks for the inspiration! Part of the reason contributing to RMFW is so rewarding is because we help writers connect with each other. We are strong! 😉

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