Why do all my books have “abandoned or neglected children” as an underlying theme? Until about book 25 (I’m writing book 57 now), when another writer pointed it out to me, I had no idea that this issue resonated throughout my writing. I’d grown up in a family of seven children and my parents had remained married until my father died late in life. So why was I writing about abandoned children?
When I asked my mother why I might have focused on this subject, she replied, “When you were four years old, your father (who was in the Air Force at the time) left to go to the Philippines and we stayed behind in Little Rock. You took a photo of him to bed with you for a month, until it was in tatters, and cried yourself to sleep.”
Aha! All questions answered. I was “abandoned” when I was four years old and, according to my mother, didn’t see my father again for an entire year. No wonder the topic of abandonment—and subsequent healing through love—pervades my books.
But as in my novels, mothers don’t always tell the truth. Or at least, not the whole truth.
Recently, my sister Jeanne, who was one year older than I, died of complications from diabetes. My cousin Ron wrote that he had “a nice story about Jeanne” to share with us.
Here’s what he said: “I remember when your father was stationed at Langley, Virginia, my mother got the wild idea that she had to visit her baby brother [who was my father]. I know there were presents, so it was probably around Christmas. We got in the car [in Baltimore] and drove down to your parents’ house.”
At the time Ronnie wrote about, my mother had a brand new baby (my sister, Jackie, born October 22), a three-year-old (me), a four-year-old (my sister Jeanne) and a five-year-old (my sister Joyce). From Ron’s story it appears that she wasn’t getting much help from my father, and there wasn’t enough money to buy a refrigerator or pay for heat.
“When we left,” Ron finished, “we took Jeanne with us. I don’t remember if she stayed a few weeks or a few months.”
Cousin Ron’s story provided answers to questions that had remained unanswered all my life, but which had appeared in my writing all along. Apparently, in an effort to help out my overwhelmed mother, Jeanne was taken to live with my aunt’s family.
My sister Joyce and I have always been best friends, even though she’s daughter #1 and I’m daughter #3. We shut Jeanne, daughter #2, completely out. I’ve always wondered why. Now I know. Jeanne left. She went away for three weeks—or three months. But during that period, Joyce and I bonded. My mother never acknowledged having sent Jeanne away, so we were unaware of what had happened when we were children.
When Jeanne returned, my family immediately left Virginia and moved to Little Rock, Arkansas, where we stayed while my father moved to his new station in the Philippines.
Within the period of a year, I had lost my sister, who “disappeared” and then “reappeared,” then moved from one home to another, and then lost my father, who “disappeared” and didn’t “reappear” for an entire year, at which point we moved to the Philippines to join him.
This is a fascinating story all by itself. I can see how I might have ended up writing about abandoned and neglected children. But there’s more.
In December 2013, Harlequin reissued a book I wrote in 2002 called Sisters Found. Interesting title. I’d previously written a book called The Substitute Groom in which the two heroines, twin girls, were named Hope and Faith. I was at a dinner meeting when a Harlequin sales rep asked, “So where’s Charity?”
I sat there stunned. And realized suddenly, “There’s a Charity!”
It doesn’t take much psychology to figure out that I wrote The Substitute Groom about myself and Joyce, completely excluding Jeanne, even though the names I chose suggested there was a third child.
What I wrote in Sisters Found, eleven years before I learned the story of what happened to my sister Jeanne, is little short of astonishing.
In Sisters Found I wrote that Faith and Hope weren’t twins, they were two of a set of triplets. Charity was given away when she was two years old because her parents couldn’t afford to care for three children.
Charity confronts her parents about why she was given away in this wrenching scene from Sisters Found.
“Why me?” she demanded. “How did you choose? I want to know.”
Her mother and father exchanged a glance before her father turned to her and said, “Of course we kept Faith, because we would always love her as she is [with a missing hand], when others might not. Hope was the troublemaker, the one who howled with colic. You were the most beautiful of our three lovely daughters.”
“We’re triplets,” Charity countered. “We look exactly alike.”
“You were the prettiest, with deep brown eyes that saw so much,” he continued. “Such a perfect baby, always laughing, always smiling.”
“Newborns don’t laugh or smile.”
Her parents exchanged a troubled glance, and she remembered what her father had told her. She’d been two years old when they’d given her away. Had spent two years being loved by them, held by them, a part of them.
“We tried so hard to keep all three of you,” her father said. “But it wasn’t possible. We knew that whoever became your parents would have to love you, because you were such a good child, such a happy baby. We gave up our most precious child. The one most certain to be loved by strangers.”
I don’t know if I actually heard a conversation such as that as a three-year-old, but I will always wonder how much truth there is in it.
Most authors I know write some consistent theme. Mary Balogh’s books feature terrible family rifts that are mended through loving the right man. Susan Mallery also writes about relationships that mend families. Sandra Brown’s characters all have conflicts with authority. Debbie Macomber’s books focus on family and faith.
I didn’t consciously choose to write about abandoned children, but the subject has found its way into every book I’ve written. If you haven’t already done it, you might want to take a closer look at your own novels and see what you find.
I’m working now on a new series of Bitter Creek novels, Sinful, Shameless, and Surrender, which just happen to feature women who’ve been physically abandoned by their mother and emotionally abandoned by their father. Imagine that.
I don’t think I can consciously change what I write. Nor do I want to. The powerful emotions that end up on the pages of my books come from the wounded child inside. My sister’s death, as sad as it is, has brought me solace and understanding. I can’t wait to see what wonderful stories of healing and love find their way onto the pages of my books from now on.
Joan Johnston is the top ten New York Times and USA TODAY bestselling author of 56 novels and novellas with more than 15 million copies of her books in print. Watch for the reprint of Outlaw’s Bride in mid-October and the second book in her King’s Brat series, Shameless, in stores December 29. You can reach Joan through her website, www.joanjohnston.com or Facebook at www.facebook.com/joanjohnstonauthor.