One of the tricky bits of being an artist is getting feedback and advice.
In the beginning, fledgling artists need help finding their wings. It’s a common problem with novices in any field—not knowing what they don’t know and not knowing what to ask. Asking “How do you do it?” without adequate antecedent for that second “do” is just frustrating for everybody.
The trickiest bit is sifting through the plethora of offered advice to pick the useful grains from the piles of bovine-stained straw. What makes it so tricky is that the only really valid answer to practically any question is “It depends,” and almost nobody wants to hear that. The matter is further complicated by the reality that no two people will agree on which is grain and which is straw. The kernels of truth take on strange glamours in the mind, leaving “Kiteo, his eyes closed*” levels of communication between individuals.
Beyond that, it’s not uncommon to find yourself buried in suggestions, advice, tips, tricks, and pointers of dubious and somewhat questionable provenance.
One of the lessons I didn’t learn soon enough is that it’s okay to reject it all.
This goes back to the fundamental notion that, while there is One True Path, no True Paths are the same. My True Path won’t work for you. Yours won’t work for me. We may share pieces in common. We may both abhor first person or present tense. We might agree on the complete pointlessness of prologues—or the necessity of them.
And here’s the problem. Once you’ve asked for advice, how do you get out of it?
Not everybody agrees that all True Paths are different. When discussing the arts with fellow practitioners, you may find those people who insist on being Right. Regardless of any suggestions to the contrary or explanations of a differing point of view, the speaker will go on at great length on the subject of how Right they are. After a while, the novice begins to think that, perhaps, the speaker is correct. It doesn’t feel right, but maybe the ideas have merit.
What’s a person to do?
First, consider that the advice might be valid even if you’re sure it’s not. Make a mental note to cross-check it, get a little triangulation on the idea, a second opinion. Don’t take the first answers. Ask a few times. Sift the straw and see what kernels emerge.
Second, consider that the person might have an agenda, something they’re trying to sell. What do they gain if you buy the Magic Elixir of Truth? Sometimes people have agendas they’re not aware of. Does this individual want something, and are you willing or able to provide it?
Third, consider that you might be wasting your time. When the same person offers the same advice—advice you’ve already heard, investigated, weighed, and considered—maybe you should find somebody else to ask.
Thank them for their time and—in the words of a certain cartoon panther—exit stage left.
*See: Tamarian Language
Thanks, Nathan!