One Little Dialogue Tip

I’m here with a quick tip for writing dialogue. It’s nothing new, but it really grabbed me this time around. It’s something I noticed while reading Angie Thomas’s novel The Hate U Give.

It’s a stirring book, and yeah, it’s Thomas’s first novel. Twenty-five hundred reviews on Amazon; five solid stars. Praise is pouring in from all corners.

It’s YA. I don’t read much YA, but I was pulled into this one due to an energy on every page. A lightness, despite the heavy topic.

Boilerplate: Sixteen-year-old Starr Carter moves between two worlds: the poor neighborhood where she lives and the fancy suburban prep school she attends. The uneasy balance between these worlds is shattered when Starr witnesses the fatal shooting of her childhood best friend Khalil at the hands of a police officer. Khalil was unarmed.

Yes, right out of the headlines—but so well written.

I started watching one thing Thomas does. Whether it’s on purpose or not, I don’t know. But when she gets the dialogue up and running, she minimizes the descriptive crap that clogs up the flow.

Descriptive crap? Yep. You know, when you try to step in the middle of what your characters are saying to slip in backstory or the color of the curtains—as if that matters. Angie Thomas, for the most part, really wrings that stuff out.

I’ve seen others talk about this, but the idea is rhythm. In “real” life the conversation doesn’t stop for descriptive crap, and it shouldn’t on the page, either. And in “real” life people rarely go on for paragraphs when they talk. It’s short and, to use the old cliché, punchy.

Okay, here’s how I would distill the idea: the little bits you include in the dialogue should take as long to read as the actual “action” might take in real life.

As so (from The Hate U Give):

“What’s it about this time?” I ask.
“Pop Tarts,” Britt says.
Hailey turns to us and points at Luke. “This jerk actually said they’re better warmed up in the microwave.”
“Eww,” I say, instead of my usual “Ill,” and Maya goes, “Are you serious?”
“I know, right?” says Hailey.
“Jesus Christ!” Luke says. “I only asked for a dollar to buy one from the machine!”
“You’re not wasting my money to destroy a perfectly good Pop Tart in a microwave.”
“They’re supposed to be heated up!” he argues.
“I actually agree with Luke,” Jess says. “Pop Tarts are ten times better heated up.”
I move my shoulder so her head isn’t resting on it. “We can’t be friends anymore.”
Her mouth drops open, and she pouts.
“Fine, fine,” I say…

Notice how your eyes drink this in? How clean it is? How little happens between what the characters are saying? (Yes, the subject is frothy, but there’s tension nonetheless.)

When in doubt with your characters, keep the dialogue simple. Listen to your characters talk. Then we can hear what they’re saying.

And we’ll want to keep right on listening (reading).